Monday, October 17, 2011

Day Fifty-Six: Goblinoster ho!

I should probably describe what happened on Friday. That last entry... confusing? No doubt.

As you remember, diary, I'd been saved from a squad of genteel zombies by a rat that had been living in my armour. Once the rat went back inside, I just... lay there. In the canyon. What was I supposed to do? My feet were a mess. I had no food or water, so I was really weak. I needed a break. That break turned into a short nap. And that nap, uh, full blown sleep.

When I woke up hours later, I found myself on this... this... bed of rats. There were hundreds of them, and they were carrying me across the plains on their. Another batch off to the left had my armour. I don't know how they got it off me, and I shudder to think of it. Rats made me naked, diary. That's weird.

I didn't know what to say or what to do. How do you react to a horde of rats, creatures you've been eating for years, suddenly helping you for no reason? They might have been taking me off to eat me in a cave or something, true, but I didn't think so. And, nope, they eventually dropped me off in the middle of a field a skittered away, into the rain.

As it turns out, that field was RIGHT IN FRONT of Goblinoster. Hence the rain. Pretty sweet, eh? Pretty sweet.

Once all the rats were gone - I don't think that includes my little friend in my armour, who I assume was somehow responsible for the trip - I tried to stand. And I could! My legs were okay! Still sore, but I think the rats massaged my feet the whole way. What nice little critters. I won't be eating rats anymore.

Er. You're made out of rat skin, diary. I hope they don't hold that against me.

So yeah. There I was at Goblinoster, confused as hell and quite wet, sitting on the outskirts of town, and... well, okay, that's pretty much where I am now. I don't wanna go inside. Would you enter a city full of goblins without a plan? Especially if you were a human, their least favourite race of all time?

(Now I'm picturing you as a human, diary. I think you would have brown hair. In a ponytail. And a mustache. Don't know why. That just seems 'you'.)

Right now I'm hiding in a little tool shed. Emphasis on little, 'cause goblins are tiny folk. I still have my cloak, so my armour doesn't stick out, but I'm gonna be damn visible as soon as I enter the town. The only thing I probably resemble is a troll when it comes to height, and even then I'll be a wimpy troll. They're huge. Plus they're all controlled by the army, so wouldn't masquerading as one get me arrested and trapped and stuff?

I'll keep you posted, diary. Right now I'm just gonna rest a bit longer. I'm really tired.


Dragomir the Adventurer

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