Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Day Fifty-Two: Festivities of the damned

I spent a night in a camp full of zombies, diary. It was... unpleasant. And that's an understatement.

Like I said, once the zombies learned I was out-of-bounds, they became real friendly. A bit... too friendly, for my tastes, 'cause they made me the center of attention. I had to participate in every little ritual during their day of thanks, so whenever something was going on I was right in the thick of things. Like, uh:

- Dressing up as an ancient zombie chief and participating in a silly play
- Sitting at the front table and playing a game of chess with the chief, which made no sense to me at all
- Accepting the first piece of raw marmot offered at the table, and eating it while everybody watched - I vomited SO MUCH
- Joining in the 'ahhhhhhhh' ceremony, where everybody just stands around and moans - we did that for an HOUR
- Having the first dance with the chief's daughter - I kinda ripped off one of her fingers by accident, which they took as a sign of impending marriage
- And, uh, um, er, spending my first night with my new bride, trying to keep her off of me... this was the most horrifying event of my life, diary, as some disheveled, ugly, rotting girl tried to have her way with me

Don't tell Libby about that last part, diary. I pray to the gods she never reads you. I hope NOBODY reads you. Ugh, my skin still crawls.

So now I'm on the run. I think I may have offended the zombies by taking off in the middle of the night. Fortunately I got all my gear back, and they had some leftover food from some goblins they'd ambushed. Better than eating rotten zombie food. Yay for thievery? (Is that thievery if you steal from murderers?)

All that said and done and stuff, and after sleeping in a little cave I found, I'm on my way again. The goblin tracks are still fresh, so getting to Goblinoster hopefully won't be that tough. My map's useless 'cause I haven't a clue where I am anymore, so these better be the right tracks. Otherwise... who knows where I'll wind up.

Oh, and Philip is still here. He watched everything in the zombie camp. Keeps drawing lewd pictures of an undead girl jumping me. I hate Philip.


Dragomir the Adventurer

No comments:

Post a Comment