Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Day Eighty-Seven: Ow, my undies

Back by the latrines again today, diary, so went for a walk. A long walk. I haven't seen the castle in ages, so why would I miss this chance to meet everyone again when they're NOT emptying their bowels? It's tough to carry a conversation when the air smells of a butt!

Castle Longjohns doesn't look much different from when I left, though the magical tornado cure thing wrecked it up a bunch. (Sorry to everyone. I thought I was doing good!) The merchants, smiths and craftsmen are still workin' away in the bailies, the guards and the royal guards are still patrollin' their guts out, the Neck is still chewing up people dumb enough to walk on it, and the prince is still causing trouble.

Yeah. The prince. He, uh, snuck up on me today and gave me a wedgie. Haven't seen him in weeks and the first thing he does is give me a wedgie! His mom said he was nicer than he seemed, but I think when he's away from his retainers he's just a brat. Better not say that about the prince of the realm, I could get my head chopped off. Anyway!

I did, after getting wedgied, have a little conversation with Prince Logan:

"You were gone a long time," he said, balancing on the outer wall with one leg. "Still can't pick up weapons?"


"You're weird. Wanna see me do a backflip?" And then he did one without waiting for an answer. Showoff.

"You should, uh, be more careful on the wall. Your majesty."

"The Baron tells me what to do, not you." He nudged me with his foot while standing on his hands.


One finger. Gods, how does he do it? I've never seen anyone as acrobatic as the prince. Not even acrobats!

Eventually he got bored and left (flipped over the side of the wall), but he told me to come back to that spot - overlooking the western plains, 'cause it's emu season and he likes watching the birds running - tomorrow. He's the prince. What choice do I have?


Dragomir the Guard

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