Tuesday, February 7, 2012

Day One-Thirty-Seven: Co-workers are the pits

Man. Bernard is such a dick.

I realize now that I've called a lot of people dicks or douches or assholes or whatnot, diary, and I apologize - but they've all got it comin'! Each and every one of 'em has proven themselves worthy of sitting on my shit list. Nobody's ever nice to me!

… well, yeah, that's not true. MOST people are nice to me. I just talk about the people who are jerks. Weird how that works - the folks who do right by ya get ignored. Maybe I'm just a big whiner.

But the point stands. Bernard is a jerk! He's never liked me, and now that I have to spend all day near the stubby bastard, he's even worse.

Lemme tell you how it works. We're shuttling supplies to the queen's tree, remember, and because there are four builders on the job, we have some trouble keeping track of 'em all. So a royal guard keeps watch over the queen and the workers who are busy with the enclosure while Bernard and I walk back and forth from the castle with the lads fetching the supplies. It's not far to the queen's tree from the castle, but the weather's bad and they're wussy enough that they need the company, I guess.

That means I spend a lot of time with Bernard, and I'm constantly exposed to how much he doesn't like me. I don't even know why, either - what'd I ever do to him?! Hell, if it weren't for my BROTHER getting Philip killed about a billion years ago, Bernard wouldn't have this job!

He doesn't care, though. He's always calling me a lunkhead or a piss ant or a jerk whenever I try to talk to 'em, and he always follows the insults up with his stupid horse laugh. I hate that laugh, diary, it grates on my nerves.

And try to ask him anything? Fuggedaboutit. He's closer to the captain than me (probably explains WHY he doesn't like me), so I figured he might know something 'bout the captain's writing. So I asked him. You know what he said?

"Don't give a rat's butt none, Dragomir. Writin's for turds, and the cap'n ain't a turd, so he must not write. You're prob'ly lyin' or somethin'. An' I bet YOU write, so that makes you a turd! Har har har!"

And he picked his nose, which I'd find gross if I didn't do it myself on occasion. Gotta keep that thing clean somehow.

Sigh. Gonna be a long week - and I'll probably spend it with the captain on my mind. That's not abnormal, really, though NORMALLY when I think about the captain it's how I can avoid him while I'm screwing around. Weird feeling, diary.


Dragomir the Guard


  1. Yes Dragomir...give into the hate...feel the darkside flowing through you...now pants the guy infront of the Queen when you have the chance...

    (Word Of The Day: 'manlydh' "YA NEED TAH BEH MAOR MANLYDH!!!")

  2. Manlydh... I'd really like to work that into somebody's dialogue, and I think I know the perfect (upcoming) character... lesse if I remember.