Thursday, June 28, 2012

Day Two-Thirty-Nine: Down with 'The Man'


The castle's been in an uproar ever since the merchants were ordered away yesterday. A few are still around today, trying to pawn off the last of their wares before they travel, and none of 'em are happy. They're outright refusing to sell anything to us guards. I guess they figure we're gonna drive them out if they don't leave.

Which… we will.

But not if Logan has anything to say about it.

Sound contradictory? Read on.

The merchants have formed up a staging area in the main thoroughfare for selling the last of their stuff, and all us guards were called in to watch over the place. Y'know, make sure nobody got too rowdy. I was once again pulled off prince-hunting duty to report to the main thoroughfare -

- though when I got there, I FOUND the prince. And, surprise surprise, he was addressing the guards, telling us all to leave the castle!

"Go!" he kept yelling, standing out of reach on the roof of a now-abandoned pawnbroker's shop. "Get out! I order you to disperse and leave this castle! Right now, like!"

Cedric wasn't too happy about this, and he took up the role of official opposition to Logan. "Oh no, ya don't. You buncha bastards are stayin' right here. What's the meanin' of your actions, m'lord? Why are you doing this?"

"I don't need to explain to a putz like YOU!" Logan retorted. He spat on the captain's helmet. "This is an official decree! You're to get the hell outta here! Post-haste!"

Logan waved, violently, towards the front gate of the castle. He wobbled so much that he almost fell from his perch. Everyone gasped, less because we feared for his life and more because Prince Logan would NEVER wobble under normal circumstances. Something was very wrong.

Prince and captain continued to argue, both ineffectually, and we guards on the ground discussed a way to get Logan off of the rooftops and into custody. We were saved from this terrible duty when the Omega Corps showed up, Eve leading the way.

I don't know that I've ever seen the entirety of the corps in one place before. They're usually standing guard in one spot or another, and though you might see seven or eight at a time, you never see the lot. Here they were, though, marching down from the keep, four men to a row, quiet and crisp and efficient. Creepy bastards.

Even though Eve was the clear leader as Lord Knight, one of the corpsmen did the talking. "Prince Logan, you are ordered to come down and relinquish yourself unto our care. Do not resist."

Every guard there was shocked into silence. It sounded like they were arresting the prince of the kingdom.

Logan didn't pay the man any attention. He kept yelling at us normal guards. "Don't make me tell you again, you lazy tart-guzzlers! Get outta my castle immediately or you'll suffer my wrath!"

That did it for the royal guards. Without a word they dispersed, either charging towards the shop or looping behind it to cut the royal brat off. I heard later that they tried climbing the surrounding buildings to get up to the roof, which must've been quite a sight with those big floppy sleeves, but Logan was already gone by then.

Logan ignored the incoming guards. He focused, instead, on Eve. She hadn't moved from her spot, and she was staring up at him. If she was distressed or outraged, she didn't show it.

"My soon-to-be-wife!" Logan cried, laughing. He sounded rather mad. "You need to get out of here, too! If you're gonna be my bride, you better obey me, sweet cheeks! Make tracks!"

"A wiry, rye mandala," she replied, rolling her eyes. "Truly noon."

"You and me both, lady!" Logan held a hand up to his forehead, wobbled, and sneered at the lot of us. "Fine! I tried! I can't… I can't force you, so I'm outta here!"

He leaped. His jump wasn't perfect, but it carried Logan well away from the pawnbroker's shop and out of sight. Haven't seen him since.

The royal guards quickly gave up their efforts and went back to their original duties, Eve abandoning them to take up her usual, neglectful, gruesome habits. (Specific: She plundered a cage of chickens and ate 'em, bones and all.) Cedric ordered us back to watching over the merchants.

Well, 'cept me. He told me to keep searching for Logan. Did it without any sarcasm or anger. If I didn't know better, I'd say he was genuinely concerned for the prince. (There's gonna be a poem in there, somewhere. IIIIIIIIII juuuuuuuust beeeeeeet.)

The mystery remains. Why is Logan telling everyone to leave? What's he got to gain from it? And why is he looking so unwell?

Also, sweet cheeks?


Dragomir the Tracker


  1. "Truly Noon" = "Loony Runt"? Having a harder time with Eve's first statement, but I think she's definitely speaking in anagrams... First one has the word "married" or "marry" in it, I think.

    1. I tried putting the first phrase through several Anagram decoders, and a few solvers. Unfortunately there is over 400 possible sentence/word combinations of all the letters in the first phrase she says. So I'm gonna take a guess and say that Matt is either messing with us by using a garbled/made-up language for Eve, or he has some sort of code that we just can't easily read. XD

  2. I want you to get the hell out...priceless. xD