Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Day Two-Eighty-Seven: General Complaints

Dragomir the Mayor.

I wrote that yesterday. As a conclusion.

What happened to 'Dragomir the Guard'? I was so fond of that name. It fit me perfectly. I was a guard, a lowly little bugger in a big, stupid castle, free of any great responsibilities. My captain beat me, my wife harped on about this and that, my king did… utter nonsense… and I had adventures. Painful adventures, but, in retrospect, kinda fun.

Man. I miss just being a guard. I'm not even fully a mayor yet and I STILL miss being a guard. Those good days seem so far off, now…

King Gok hasn't answered my appeals for supplies. I haven't seen the little windbag since our meeting last week. I spent a lot of time with Grylock instead, and though he offered NO promises regarding my requests, he's at least trying to help me with my problem. Granted that he's making fun of me as he does, but that's Grylock being himself. He's an asshole.

They're probably silent because they're busy. I have to give the goblins that much. We don't know a HELL of a lot, being cooped up in a room all day, but we've heard whispers that the goblins are beefing up their defences. King Gok's apparently ordered the construction of a wall around Goblinoster, and civilian goblins are being trained and conscripted into a force of long-range archers. Gotta keep a steady eye on the horizon, lest… undesirables… creep in.

Big, black, green-eyed undesirables.

From a door.

A reeeeeeeally biiiiiiig doooooooor.

I don't know what to call them. Do they have a name? Are they all part of the same race? I couldn't see much when I was… dying… but they seemed to come in all shapes 'n sizes. A bunch of the ones coming through the door were kinda human-sized, but others… others were MASSIVE. Like the royal guards.

Those Omega Corps bastards. I always KNEW they were up to no good. KNEW IT.

And then there were flying ones… and creeping ones… and… one… that was a penguin… I mean, how do you RATIONALIZE this race?! They're all over the fuckin' place! I don't know what to call 'em, I don't know if they have a name, I don't know what they ARE, I only know that they're a bunch of JERKS and they've got my DAUGHTER and I hope the whole lot of 'em got CRUSHED by the collapsing CASTLE though I know they DIDN'T 'cause Gok's spies said they HAVEN'T and and and balls.

BALLS, diary. The world has tipped balls-up, and I've been left to gather the pieces and rearrange 'em into a tidy little settlement. SIGH.

So. Yeah. Gok's busy with that. Building up the defences. That's a good idea, I gotta give him that much - even IF the goblins are great at detecting bad guys long before they get past the borders.


Wonder how I managed to do it, all those months ago. I was stumblin' all over the place. Guess the rats had a hand in keeping me invisible…?

Bah. The rats. They were right all along. Shoulda trusted them more. They didn't tell me much of use, but I shoulda trusted them more anyway. They knew all this was gonna happen. Wonder where they are, these days…?

Done for now. I need to beg Libby to fetch me some food from the kitchens downstairs. She's still got me chained to our bed, and she plays the pregnancy card whenever I ask her to do something. Yet she won't let anybody ELSE step in and help me! Keeps chasin' off all those nobles! Dangit, woman, if I have to be mayor, I should be able to enjoy SOME of the privileges of rank! SOMEBODY GET ME A DAMNED SANDWICH!

Sigh. In short, little to report today. Still waiting on Gok. I tried my best to make the entry amusing...?


Dragomir the Mayor

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